Emily’s mystery-in-progress was inspired by her years walking dogs in Brooklyn Heights. Professional dog walkers had keys to their clients’ tony apartments, and the novel opened up with the murder of an Irish setter’s elderly owner. Emily constructed a world within a world of Brooklyn yuppies, irregular dog chips that stored nefarious information, mysterious paintings, and what she loved most, dogs.

I’ll never know how she intended her story to end. But catching Covid in the hospital and dying from it wasn’t it.

Music and Movies. That was always our thing. Pop fostered my love of the arts without me even realizing it. He always said I was an old soul. I was just 6 years old when I fell in love with music by “Fleetwood Mac”, “Journey”, “ELO”, “Styx”, “Bee Gees” and “Styx”.

I remember being in his old, red Ford pickup truck, with my pink jelly sandals on and Rainbow Brite dress, with him singing along to Journey’s “Oh Sherrie”, the beautiful smile on his face as he sang it horribly on purpose, the sound of his chuckle, the way his hands looked as he turned the volume up.

As I got older to my teen years, is when I discovered Tracy Chapman’s “Give Me One Reason,” Spice Girls “Wannabe,” and Aqua’s “Barbie Girl”. I think I played those so many times he really wanted to introduce me to other artists, and he succeeded.

I was 15 years old when I discovered I loved country music as well. During this time, Pop and I really delved into not only listening to songs, but discussing their meanings and how they must have felt when they were writing the song.

I have 3 favorite country songs that I hold close to my heart because of my Dad. The first song is the first country song he played for me, “Everywhere” by Tim McGraw. I still remember the grin on his face, as the sun beamed down on him through his truck window as he turned up the song and began singing the lyrics. His favorite part was “down in Georgia, picking’ them peaches” and “in my heart I’ll always see you everywhere”. Now that he’s gone, I keep that song close to me because in my heart, I will always see Pop everywhere.

The second song is “How Do You Like Me Now?” by Toby Keith. He loved telling me the story about this song, how it was based on a true story and we loved watching the music video for it. This became one of our most favorite songs, we listened to it a million times on the way to school in the morning.

Then there was the country song he loved to annoy me with which was “Before He Cheats” by Carrie Underwood. Funny enough, Pop drove the exact same color red, Dodge pickup truck featured in this video. This song used to drive me bonkers. Now, I’m thankful for all the laughs and memories it gave me with my Dad. I’ll never forget all the songs we shared and laughed about together.

Now, let’s talk movies. One of my all time favorite movies we used to watch all the time was “Grease 2”, I made him watch it so many times when I was little that we could still recite the songs as I grew up! He also introduced me to “The Rocky Horror Picture Show” when I was in high school. Our favorite song to sing was “Dammit Janet” and “Time Warp”. He even took me to the Alabama Theatre to see it on the big screen which was so much fun. Pop gave me the world. He changed my life when he introduced me to music and movies. He fostered my love of painting, he encouraged me in everything I did and gave me some of the best memories while we listened to music, in his truck, on the way to school. For all you movie whizzes out there, Pop always told my then boyfriend, now husband “Nobody Puts Baby in the Corner” as he firmly shook his hand before we left to go out on our date. You guessed it, that’s from “Dirty Dancing”, yes that movie will always be phenomenal to me!

Pop loved Johnny Cash, Aerosmith, CCR, Highwayman. If I had to describe how much Pop loved me by picking lyrics from our songs, it would be “Hey Brother” by Avicii. The lyrics “if the sky comes falling down, for you, there’s nothing in this world I wouldn’t do, oh sister I will help you out”. Next, would be “Butterfly Kisses” by Bob Carlisle. “There’s two things I know for sure, she was sent here from Heaven and she’s Daddy’s little girl”. I’m thankful I got to dance with Pop to this song at my wedding. In the photos, my sweet husband has tears in his eyes as he watches Pop and I dance. We too, had tears in our eyes. I loved every single second of that moment.

For awhile after Pop died, I avoided music and movies like the plague because I was trying to avoid feeling the hurt, remembering all the memories we shared. But not now–now I listen to those songs, I watch those movies, and every time, I look up to heaven and proudly say “this One’s for You, Pop.”

Every parent yearns to find the perfect gift for their child, whether it’s for the holidays, birthday, or any ordinary day for that matter. Growing up as a 90s kid, one of the most iconic movies that came out was “The Rugrats Movie.” I wanted a Rugrats watch from Burger King so badly, pleading for it relentlessly. If there was something I wanted, my dad went to great lengths to get it, even if it meant driving to several Burger Kings and searching for it after a 12-hour work day, he stopped one last time and tiredly said, “I need the watch for my daughter” and they were happy to help him with my favorite watch.

It’s still a special memory, aside from loving my gift, I know how much effort he put into everything to make me happy. This has also become a phrase we jokingly say all the time, and I know he’s laughing right now.

I’m at my desk yesterday. I have my music on in the background listening to my favorite songs from the 60’s and 70’s. Jay & The Americans start to sing their cover of “Some Enchanted Evening” from the musical South Pacific. As I listened to the song I had a memory of my husband, Mike. When that song would come on the radio he would do an impersonation of Ezio Pinza who sang the song in the movie. He would reach out for me and in his best operatic voice (he was not a singer!) and with a poor Italian accent he would belt out “Sum-a enchan ted a eve en ing a” and I would dissolve into laughter.

This brought a smile to me yesterday as I remembered the many silly ways he could make me laugh throughout our almost 50 years together. My smile soon turned to having to fight back tears. This memory, although innocent as it seemed, filled my heart with the loneliness and longing and love for Mike that I will carry with me forever. Memories come in all shapes and sizes. They may not be elaborate. They might surprise you. They might be something only you can cherish. They might be a part of your love story or a part of your life story. They might be sentimental or just plain silly. Thanks, Mike, for the memories.

Often when we remember those we’ve lost, whether in sharing stories, memories, or obituaries, we only tell of the good things.

For me, my Dad’s missteps, mistakes and faults are what made him who he was.

Dad’s parents divorced when he was four and his father, for whatever reason, chose not to be a part of his life. When Dad was around 15 he stole his new step dad’s car and took off to Florida with a couple of his buddies, to play basketball. Of course, when he returned, consequences were waiting. That same “delinquent” would later teach basketball to younger kids at the community center.

At seventeen his step dad died of leukemia. Dad chose to drop out of high school and get a job to support his mom. He continued to support her the rest of her life.

My Dad learned how to be a man, husband, father, and grandfather by just living it. He learned every day of his life. I’m not saying he was perfect. He made mistakes in life, we all do. We all wish we could have those do-overs. He knew that and made himself better because of it.

For my brothers and I, we learned by being with him. Everything he missed out on, we were given. He took care of his family. Dad held and loved all the babies. His kids, grandkids and great grandkids. He taught us to do things for people without expecting anything in return, because that was what he did. He made sure we knew that what others think of you, doesn’t matter. That you don’t change who you are or how you present yourself to fit in with those who are around you, because that was how he lived. He showed us that loyalty matters, your word matters, no games, just be straight forward, just be you.

Dad became a better man as he aged. When he was a young husband he was all about work and providing for his family. By the time he was a grandpa, he helped with laundry and dirty dishes. He continued to evolve, always trying to figure out what a “man” is.

I loved my Dad because of his faults, not in spite of them. They made him who he was supposed to be. And I miss him with all my heart.