March 15, 2020: the first day we were all put on quarantine. I had fallen asleep on my parent’s couch. About 1 am I was awoken by beautiful music. I heard my dad walking around. He told me that he had been watching a Pavarotti concert, and was recording it on the DVR. He asked if I was ok, brought me a blanket, and a glass of water — just like when I was a kid. I jokingly told him I’m an adult, and could set myself up for bed. He told me “it’s my job being your dad.”

Four days later was the last time I saw my Dad, as he walked through the ER doors with a stranger. I relive that every day. Missing him.

Our Mom always wanted to make sure we were always safe. No matter how old we were, though we were grown with families of our own — she still worried. Whenever we rode with someone she would say “Safe travels, Precious Cargo.”

She would always call to say goodnight. I thought at times it was goofy and now that I am a Mom, I totally get it.

Oh what we would give to hear her voice again. And those hugs she loved to give — we miss them so much.

Good night in Heaven Mom — we are all in safe at home and ready to sleep. She would end the call with “Sweet Dreams to all.”

I hope we get to see her in our dreams.

My “Little” brother … Scott always had a smile and cheerful attitude. When we were very young, we were in a car accident with our mom. Scott was about 2 1/2. When my dad arrived at the hospital, he told a story of Scott lying on a bed, broken leg, big black eye and a huge smile. All he said was “Hi Dad!” with a huge smile.

That attitude lasted his whole life. No matter what, there was that huge smile. Always ready to cheer anyone and with his contagious smile. Oh how I miss that smile …

Our love story started on a blind date on leap day 2008. We met up at a local bar. We danced all night and when he walked me to my car, I told him I was so nervous to meet him because I didn’t know if he liked plus size. He said, “it’s what’s in here that counts” and tapped my heart. I fell in love that moment.

We fell in love and had a Super Bowl themed wedding the day before our Steelers beat the Cardinals in the Super Bowl. We even got married in Steelers jerseys. My love would say I’m so lucky that my bride wants to wear a Steelers jersey on our wedding day and I said I’m lucky I get to wear my wedding attire every Sunday watching football.

My love was my 3rd husband but he was sent to me from God; he knew I needed to find my soulmate — someone kind, hardworking, and loving. I never called my love by his name Michael — he was ‘My Love’ to me. It’s funny my friends would ask me “Maria, what is My Love’s name? I don’t want to call him My Love.”

We loved everything the same. Same food, music, religion, loved our families, dancing, and sports. He was so excited that I love football and actually know the sport. Every morning he would bring me my coffee and we would bless each other and kiss and say “I love you” as we left to work. When I would get home he would tell me in a Ricky voice, “Hey Lucy, you have some esplaining to do” and I would say “you have some esplaining to do.”

Our love for each other was so pure and perfect. Everyone would always say that we had such a beautiful relationship, a type of love that most haven’t experienced. I would get butterflies in my stomach just thinking of going home to him after work. We held hands everywhere we went.

When Covid hit our nation we were so careful but December 9th I tested positive. My love tested negative so we stayed away from each other but my love still took care of me and made sure I had something to eat. I ended up in the hospital 6 days later on oxygen and my love tested positive but they sent him home. We spoke on the phone many times during the day and he would tell me he was ok and that he didn’t want to worry me. When he brought me home 5 days later he was really sick. I was so worried I called 911 but they came and checked him out and then left him. I asked him, “why didn’t they take you?” and he said they told him to continue with the oxygen.

Next day, December 20th he was really sick. I told him “My Love, I’m calling 911” he said “Why? they’re not going to do anything.” I said “I don’t want to lose you.” He said, “you won’t lose me.” I called 911 anyway and they came and took him. As they were leaving, I kissed him and told him I love you and please come back to me and he told me I love you and I promise I’ll be back.

That was the last time I saw my love. Our last kiss, our last I love you. How did this happen? I prayed and prayed for a miracle. He was ventilated that same night. He never recovered, his kidneys shut down. I put him on dialysis, hoping it would help but 4 weeks later I got to be with him as they took him off the ventilator. I prayed I played our favorite songs. I let him know we would be ok even though I knew I wouldn’t be ok — how could I? I can only hope and pray that he heard me and knew how much I love him. My love was my best friend, my companion, my cheering partner, my soulmate, my everything.

On January 17th 2021, my heart was broken forever. I do my best to keep my love alive. I include him wherever I go. I have him with me when I watch our Steelers and U of A games. I can hardly wait until I get to be with him again. But I know that he would want me here for my daughter and his son. Did I mention that in almost 13 years together we never ever had one argument? I love you to heaven and back, My Love, Michael Eddie Suarez
Thank you for letting me share our love story.

My brother Johnny caught Covid-19 in a nursing home early in the Pandemic. The day they had originally expected him to be discharged from rehab and go home, he wound up on a ventilator instead.

A week later, a critical care physician called to tell me that his major organs had shut down. My mother and I made the heart-wrenching decision to take my 65-year-old brother off life support. Luckily I knew this would have been his decision in this horrific and hopeless situation since he had a living will. Nevertheless, we were still traumatized and haunted by being the agent of demise for a loved one we so dearly cared for.

My mother and I never stop talking about Johnny and we will never forget him. We share with each other all our memories. Eventually I hope my mother and I will get to the place where we can find peace and more joy instead of so much sorrow. I also hope that, instead of dwelling on the very difficult way Johnny died, we can enjoy more of the wonderful memories of how he lived.